he wished for me all the happiness and fulfillment of the things i wanted to be, even if it meant that we have to be apart.
he’s setting me free. and i’ve realized that never once did he ever hold me back. he’s always there, in his quiet way. encouraging. supporting. comforting.
there’s a part of me that wants to dig my toes in the dirt, fingers clawing the earth, resisting, screaming, “I just want to be with you and everything will be fine.”
there’s a part of me that would just be content enough to be what i am today, never mind the dreams i’ve forged for myself all my life. a compromise to just be with him.
but he knew and i knew that it would be fatal if we both settle for the temporary good. to dwell in all those unlived longings that are sung by our souls, permeating our daily existence, would taint our togetherness, heard as sorrowful sighs in the dark of the night.
we are both old souls who have already known the bittersweetness of life. and we both understand that this is not about some petty ego trip on both our parts. we both need to grow.
but still, this is one of those precious moments i hold dear. to be with him. to be held close and feel the strong thumping of his heart.
it is like being in a foreign country and seeing the familiar face of a friend in a sea of strangers. i know i’ll be on my way once more. but this is one of my most memorable stops. when i’ll come by again i know i will be welcomed with open arms and be enfolded in a loving embrace.
i will come back.